nsu: (Default)
paddra nsu-yeul ([personal profile] nsu) wrote in [community profile] musekbox2014-05-08 05:58 pm

GOD!Hope

Yeul was settled with Caius, her eternity was of guilt and love having lived many lives and refusing to be alone all the same. Yeul was the source of the Great Chaos that destroyed the world, there would be nothing left if she continued and lost her control. That control was only there because Caius existed and to remove her from that was to leave her without a person who could exist forever.

The shadows of her former selves roamed the halls of Etro's castle until this day, the time where she was existing was up; she must atone for her sin against the world. Yeul felt a tugging and she suddenly reached for Chaos, her Chaos surrounding him as she was unable to touch him as she could in life. They were each other's obsession.

The silver-haired maiden was suddenly yanked from her castle, her body appearing on a starry background and unstable ground as it appeared when she needed them. For the first time, Yeul could stand on a pair of real legs, she remembered the agony of her limp and looked around for a way to exit but she only saw a platform far ahead of her. In silence, she made her way up as her steps were positioned on platforms as they appeared until she saw Hope. She tilted her head to the right, she was not sure if this was something she was dreaming.

"Where is this place?" Yeul said, softly and listlessly.
shadeofhope: (we stand to see the end of days)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2014-05-09 04:10 am (UTC)(link)
The Guardian. Hope knew him as Caius Ballad, the immortal man whose goal had been the end of the world: the only way he could save the Seeress. There was a displeased turn in his chest, a twinge that might have signified more than displeasure.

It was bad enough, the feeling in his head said, to bring the form of one so similar to Etro to this domain. He would not allow for the carrier of her heart to enter as well. None of Hope's wishes to resolve this peacefully, to find a solution to the Chaos without ending the current world, would be able to change His mind.

The teenage boy looked on calmly, completely still. "His decision should not be yours. What I offer is a power beyond what you have experienced -- simply for the solution to a problem that is plaguing humanity. Do you not want to see them prosper? Do you not want a future for them?"
shadeofhope: (here to say goodbye)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2014-05-09 05:45 am (UTC)(link)
"Your splintering was a mistake. One made by the inexperienced, by the powerless."

The name Etro barely formed in Hope's mouth before his jaw snapped shut, deny the existence of such a word, such a name. He was not to bring the word into the world. It was bad enough Hope still pondered on the fate of the supposed Goddess.

Instead, movements jerkier than anticipated, Hope reached out a gloved hand. The gesture was meant to be disarming -- merely one child offering help to another, promising a miracle sought after through the ages. Bhunivelze offered nothing for free; she would have to reach out to accept his offer.

"With what little power you have, you should know who I am. Know that I have a reach greater than the one who bled for humanity, and you shall see a future before you that holds new life and new hope."

Yes, that was what Hope wanted. To fix everything. To make things better for everyone. It would not be an empty promise.

"But first I need a solution to the Chaos. Tell me, Paddra Nsu-Yeul... how can we save this world?"
Edited ((i'm dumb, herpderp)) 2014-05-09 06:00 (UTC)
shadeofhope: (pawn in the great game)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2014-05-09 07:38 am (UTC)(link)
The touch was unexpected; startling. He couldn't help tensing at the action that he (neither the man-turned-boy nor god) had been unable to predict. There was a rolling turmoil behind his eyes, spiteful and hissing at what it took to be a blatant rejection. And how dare she reject the help of God; how dare she demand such spectacle from Him, the all-powerful! He should never have extended His help, not when the mere sight of her was repulsive to Him. Humanity was a blight to the world he created, nothing more than sacrificial lambs to be offered up in face of His goals. To think that she would defy the divine was laughable.

Yet there was still a part of Hope left confused by the actions, by the words she spoke. Confused by the pressure, the warmth, and the strange scent of her hair which was starkly contrasted with the sterile expanse around them. Of course he was there. He was the one speaking with her, echoing the words of a god whose efforts were turned elsewhere, to things of greater importance than a conversation between two humans.

(Except she was right, so very right and he railed against the prison of his own body -- she was the first person to see because that wasn't him, because Hope wouldn't have given in to the whims of God, no matter how great. Those actions weren't his own and he just wanted -- he wanted --)

"Logic dictates our arrangement as a scenario where both of us attain what we want." And he still didn't know what to do, a familiar awkwardness stemmed from centuries of isolation and before that, years where he brushed off human contact as nothing but distractions from his goal. There was an aborted attempt at comfort -- a mere twitch of his hands, a childhood reflex to hug back, before he forced tense muscles to unwind.

There was anger and violence in his veins, but that was easily ignored. There was no reason for it. He still didn't understand what she meant, and while the one watching behind his eyes was getting impatient, growing more malicious by the second, Hope had more patience than that.

Or perhaps it was just her actions which startled him from the grand plan he must have prepared.
shadeofhope: (succeed despite all)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2014-05-10 12:44 am (UTC)(link)
"That is --"

It was difficult, and he swallowed, a physical action merely reflex now seeing as it wasn't necessary for him any more. But the warmth was confusing. Distracting. Worrying, even. What did she mean?

"That is a risk for you to take. You can either choose my help or... stay as you are."

But that wasn't right. Was it? (Of course it was.) He didn't understand why she would wander so close. It was dizzying (nauseating?) and turned his words to ash in his mouth. For a moment, Hope remembered his curiosity about the Seeress of Paddra, remembered back when he had imagined the title to be one given to a series of leaders before further conversation with Noel (and wasn't he a tough nut to crack when it came to information) had revealed the title to only have been given to one: one girl. Again and again.

The same one in front of him, here and now.

He remembered wanting her help; the underlying insistence that he wasn't getting the full picture. Hope had never liked being left in the dark. Knowledge was a weapon he wielded expertly in place of metal or magic. His memories of wanting to know, wanting to understand, had led to her arrival. It may not have been his power (but was it?) which brought her, but it was his insistence.

But why? Human companionship? No, that was too strange a concept. It had been well over a century since he had stood with another individual, and longer still since he managed to connect with anyone. Of course he had forgotten it. There was nothing truly there for him to remember.

The thoughts were a distraction, one that irritated the presence in his head. He should be bargaining, should be securing a thread of the intricately woven web that God was casting, rather than thinking thoughts like this.

"I--" and he faltered, fingers curling over his palms as he stared down at his hands blankly, the residual warmth of her hands like fire on his wrist, bringing in a stark realization that there existed more than this cold, cold place.

For just a few moments, he didn't know what to say.
Edited 2014-05-10 00:47 (UTC)
shadeofhope: (eyes and ears of god)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2014-06-18 08:31 am (UTC)(link)
At the mention of gods, there was a surge or calm that spread through him like numbness to sweep away his hesitation and uncertainty. This was all in the hands of gods now, after all, and Hope had very little to do with the outcome any more. The God of Light would decide, the calm informed him. Of course she was correct; Hope did not quite remember his time with people now, and that was just as well. Less to interfere with the plans for the future, to help save the world. He didn't need the strength of men who fumbled for hundreds of years, especially as humanity slowly died off. Over three hundred years into the chaos, and mankind would soon be extinct no matter how hard they fought against mortality. Despite the lack of ageing, death still occurred. Illness, accidents, and trauma wore away at both a human body and soul -- he had seen it happen far too often, with far too many people whose faces he could barely recall now.

His goal was to save humanity, and onto this Hope knew his path was true. The means, the plan... the rest of that was a little... fuzzy. It didn't quite belong to him.

He let her do as she wished, listening intently.

"So you would allow him the fate of the world once more?" He asked, voice calm. There was nothing to be felt about what happened in the past. Instead, Hope tilted his head slightly in question. "You know of your involvement in the chaos, and allow him reign over the fate of the human race. How heavy is the weight of your decisions, Paddra Nsu-Yeul? God has the power to recreate the world, but unless He understands this enigma, then the same thing may once again happen."

He dipped his head in acknowledgement to her words, ignoring the tiny nagging in the back of his mind that perhaps he should have grasped onto her words and warmth.

"He is not powerless. He is the Maker, the Creator of worlds. Caius Ballard was once allowed the fate of the human race, and now the world lies in ruins and the balance of life and death upturned. He does not have the strength to decide for the fate of all humanity."

Hope paused, letting the weight of his words sink in.

"Do you?"
shadeofhope: (Default)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2014-06-20 10:38 pm (UTC)(link)
It was the authenticity behind the last words that had Hope smiling again, a little warmer this time than before, a little more human and a little more himself. Loneliness was a subject he was well versed in, from both experience and teaching.

"No one is truly alone." He said, feeling just a little bit like his old self again, remembering a time when he regularly reached out to people to reassure and encourage. "Even when you're left with no one else, so long as there are memories of others to guide you, you won't be alone. That's not something which can happen to a person who understands what loneliness means."

Because those who were truly lonely would never understand their plight, and Hope believed that. Loneliness was a state of mind, of understanding what it felt like to be loved and then have lost that warm feeling.

He had spend well over a century by himself here in the isolation of the divine, although he could not quite recall why (the thought merely floated by and then disappeared; his questions unanswered due to an inability to ask them in the first place).

"You're not alone now." He told her gently, fingers reaching towards hers as well in a gesture that felt both familiar and not. Hope had once been the type to reach out, to cling, but that had been long ago; long before he had grown up. But then again... he wasn't grown up right now, was he? "The decision you make now will influence everyone -- will be the turning point in your own life, but there is no such thing as a sure guarantee for success. All we have is a higher power to guide us, the thought of others to support us, and the belief that what we are doing is right."

That had to be enough. Hope had once made that enough.

He looked up at the rotating planet as well, expression unreadable. While Yeul had Caius to guide her, Hope made do with his memories to support him. Here, there was something more than memories. Here, there was power of a sort he could barely comprehend. The power to finally solve this puzzle which thwarted him for over four hundred years.

"With just that, we can do even the most impossible of things."
shadeofhope: (succeed despite all)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2014-09-28 01:25 am (UTC)(link)
"Then there will be a paradox to be fixed." He said. "Would it help to continue on like this? There is danger in every action we take, some more than others for each person, yet to ensure a future, change must occur. To not take risks may mean we continue in safety, but then problems would never be solved."

He pushed back the spark of irritation, so separate from him, which flashed with the mention of Etro. That feeling lingered, waited, and Hope understood that the only appeasement would be to get the information he needed. What it was, he remained uncertain of.

Instead, he softened his tone and gentled his words. His gaze dropped to their hands. "...There is a type of loneliness in not being able to influence the world around you. To being surrounded and yet so far apart. To not be seen and not be found. That is one that does not go away no matter who you surround yourself with, so long as you're powerless to change anything."

There, he raised his eyes to meet hers, certain of his own words even as he ignored the presence in his mind. "We have a chance to create this change. Even if we make things worse, we would have a chance to put things better. What we know is limited, but the more knowledge accumulated means the less chance for things to go wrong. And I--" because it was I this time; not God and not any other cosmic power, but the Hope who wanted to ensure a future for everyone, "I need your help."
shadeofhope: (my words are not my own)

[personal profile] shadeofhope 2015-04-04 11:07 am (UTC)(link)
"Fear means you understand." Understand that there was always the large chance of things going wrong. Of them messing up, divine influence or not. "Most fear the unknown, and your decision here will lead to a change none can predict. Not even God. There is no one who lives entirely without fear, because fear keeps them alive. It is a response that protects you."

Hope smiled, softening his words. "I don't know what will happen. But I'm glad you're here. Perhaps fear is more easily overcome with someone else there."

(His words are sincere, and it was for that sincerity that the presence behind his eyes rejoiced and cringed at the same time. It did not need others, did not need the support of what it considered abhorrent, yet by itself there was no chance at getting close that that Chaos.)

"Whether you are made whole or divine will be up to God's power." There was a nagging sensation that wanted him to tell her she wouldn't want to be divine: the divine lived and died lonely, perhaps lonelier than humans. Hope could not recall a single case (with knowledge he shouldn't know) where a divine being had the companionship that humans strived for. You may not like what you end up as, he almost wanted to say, but the words didn't make it far enough to slip past his smile.

"Let God do the work humans can not. Let Him take command."
etroscript: (pic#7616426)

[personal profile] etroscript 2015-04-16 07:52 am (UTC)(link)
Let him take command.

Yeul ran that over in her head multiple times, she did not know the outcome of being a fixed paradox. The idea of things getting worse was a large possibility, but she had no other input and no way to find someone else she knew to ask their opinion in case they had one. Yeul felt extremely uncomfortable without Caius, but she moved herself forward and closed her eyes as a way to give him silent permission for whatever he was going to do.

She had never felt fear of the unknown until now, mostly because God's will was never known directly by Etro. The small, silver-haired maiden slowly opened her arms and slipped them underneath Hope's arms and rested her cheek against his chest.

"Please, I do not want to be alone..." She muttered as softly as possible, releasing her true fear to Hope.